


Somehow We'll Be okay, Don't Be Afraid

by coruscantspark



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-19
Updated: 2021-03-19
Packaged: 2021-03-27 23:35:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30130623
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coruscantspark/pseuds/coruscantspark
Summary: Fjord stands watch over the Lavorre ladies, losing his heart a little more along the way.
Relationships: Fjord/Jester Lavorre
Comments: 5
Kudos: 63





	Somehow We'll Be okay, Don't Be Afraid

**Author's Note:**

> I JUST HAVE A LOT OF FEELINGS OKAY

“Fjord-” 

Fjord looks over at Jester expectantly but before she can continue, the rest of the group continues talking. 

He leans in a little closer. “Yeah?”

The conversation moves on and she slumps for a moment before smiling tiredly at him and rejoining the conversation. He smiles back and his gaze lingers on her for a moment. Something is up, she’s doing the thing she does to pretend she’s okay. He frowns, making a mental note to check back in when it’s quieter, and he turns back to also join the conversation about how bad it could have been to have the families inside the ball with them just in time to hear the little one announce that he’d died. He freezes in horror and looks over to Veth.

“Is that an expression in your family?” he asks hopefully.

“Nope,” Veth says, expression unreadable as she smooths her hand over Luc’s head. 

Jester’s voice was small as she confirms, “He died.”

Veth’s voice is a little shaky as she continues, “But Caduceus was able to bring him back and we’re all together now and fine.”

Fjord is aghast, mind composing worse and worse scenarios that ended with that sweet little kid in harm’s way enough that Caduceus had to bring him back. He didn’t like how good his imagination was.

“Oh…”

Still reeling and watching as the little guy stretches up to hold his new hero’s hand, he finally shakes himself out of it and begins to follow but stops when he hears Marion behind him. She’s pressed against the wall and shaking. His heart breaks for a moment, remembering how difficult it was for her to walk to their carriage in Nicodranus. Now she’s in an unfamiliar city after being in a whole other place, life in danger and after hearing the traumatic events of the other group’s evening, he can feel his own heart rate pick up in sympathy. 

His immediate instinct is to go help, his feet even move that direction before he consciously thinks about it but he stops and looks to Jester first. Jester’s eyes are wide as she realizes she needs to contact her father and take care of her mother and her hands flutter in a panic. He looks back to Marion and then back to Jester, not wanting to insert himself in such a delicate family situation but wanting to help. Jester looks at him and he puts on his best ‘how can I help’ face. Her face softens in relief and her hands wave towards her mother.

Jester finds her voice, “Fjord, help Mama.”

Relieved at being given a job he jumps to attention. “Yes, of course.” He moves over to stand close enough to Marion that she could reach him, but not so close he’s crowding her and keeping his voice soft reaches out a hand, “Marion, please take my hand.” She looks at him on the verge of panic and he keeps his face calm and open. “Come with me, it will be fine.” He keeps his hand steady and gives her a simple reassuring grin.

Jester moves away from the group for a moment to try and contact her father. Marion studies him for a moment and her rapid breaths slow slightly and she extends a shaking hand that he tucks into his elbow, leaning down a bit to compensate for their difference in height and pulls her close, trying to be as gentle and steady as possible, telegraphing every movement so as not to startle her.

Still a little breathless, she smiles up at him and teases, “Well, if you insist.” He pats her hand on his arm and smiles back.

Jester turns over her shoulder with playfully narrowed eyes, “Don’t flirt with him, Mama.”

Marion looks back at her innocently while Fjord makes confused noises looking back and forth between them.

He slowly guides them out of the alleyway, taking it at her pace. Her grip on his arm tightens as they move slowly into the open street. Her breathing picks up at the sight and her step falters. He squeezes the hand currently locked onto his arm and slows their pace even more, confident he knows the direction of the Evening Nip if the others get too far ahead and also keeping an eye on Jester who was hanging back sending a message. Feeling a bit out of his depth, he begins humming a slow and steady shanty from his sailing days, matching their pace to the rhythm of the song, tapping the syllables of the words with his fingers on her hand. 

He starts to think through alternate solutions in case this falls through. No matter what, these families had to stay safe. No other option. He briefly considers the Blooming Grove but dismisses it just as quickly. Gathering all the families in one spot is what got them in this mess to begin with and putting a target on Caduceus’s home wasn’t acceptable. Rosohna might be an option, but it’s been long enough who knows whether they’re still welcome there or not. Best not to risk it. Would taking them to the Soul make the situation worse? Probably. Can’t mess up their investigation just in case the proper channels are capable of taking down the worst of the Assembly. He switches to a different song, just as slow, and keeps on humming louder as the wind picks up. 

Marion gives a shuddering breath beside him and he looks down to make sure she’s okay. Well, as well as can be expected. Her eyes are closed now against the wind and she’s pressed into him a little more. He takes a moment and studies her. He can see Jester’s eyes and nose in her and he’s seen how they share the same easy smile. 

The strength in both of them fills him with awe. The bravery shown in just the last day boggles his mind. And, as his arm begins to ache just a little under her grasp, not just their inner strength either. These women could knock him into last week if they wanted to. He’s glad for it. From the moment he’d met Marion, everything about her strength and fierce love had felt like home, like what he’d always imagined a mother could be, had seen in Veth before but couldn’t abstract to himself being, well, much older than her. But with Marion, watching her face her waking nightmare with such courage fills his heart with a love that had always simmered there, desperate to spark to life, lacking a mother to bestow it upon. That was something he’d go down fighting to protect. He can feel his ears warming and snaps back out of that train of thought. 

Jester runs up to join them, and holds Marion’s other hand. He keeps humming but looks over to Jester over her mother’s head. She makes a face and shrugs at him. He tries to puzzle out what that might have meant but they’re arriving at the door of the tavern, Yasha holding the door open for everyone and ushering them in out of the rain. Marion’s eyes are tightly shut. She relaxes perceptively when they duck into the interior of the building, cautiously opening her eyes and looking around.

His heart thumps proudly as she gasps out a small, “I’ve never been here before.” He nods at her with a smile and squeezes her hand as Jester nods happily at her too. The others argue over the password to get to the basement before they all pile down the stairs, Fjord slipping her hand out of the crook of his elbow to help her down the stairs. He can see a calm start to pass over her, surrounded now by walls and a roof and she descends the stairs as elegantly as in any of her performances. To anyone else she would seem to have collected herself, but Fjord can feel her trembling hand as she steps lightly onto the basement floor and immediately reaches for his arm again. As they take in the scene before them, he can feel the tension in her shoulders as she’s once again faced with the unknown. 

Silently he vows not to leave her side the entire time.

Once the initial greetings are over and they’re shown to some quarters, he guides Marion after Jester into the room set aside for her. She slowly pulls away from him and walks around the perimeter of the room, tracing her fingertips along the wall. Her gaze is distant and Jester watches from the center of the room with concern in her eyes. She reaches the bed and runs a hand over it before sitting delicately on the edge. She takes a deep breath and sinks her head into her hands, shoulders shaking in heaving sobs. Jester’s face crumples too and she joins her mother on the bed, holding her as they both cry. 

Fjord stands in the doorway, once again feeling like he’s intruding but not wanting to leave, desperately wanting to go and offer comfort but still unsure if he’d be welcome. Eventually he settles on closing the door almost all the way, enough that he can watch the hallway from inside the room and keep an eye on the Lavorres. Summoning the sword, he leans against the wall breathing easy for the first time in a while, still keeping watch so no lookieloos intrude on any of their rooms. Yasha leaves one of the rooms and catches his eye and stands on the other side of the mostly closed door. 

Her eyes soften hearing the cries coming from inside.

“Hey,” she says gently. “How are things?”

“About as well as can be expected,” he replies softly. “How’s everyone else?”

“Beau is with Caleb right now. He’s...not well,” she says with a concerned frown. “Something about him burning nearly to death and just well, you know.” She gestures awkwardly with her hands before crossing her arms. “I haven’t seen Veth and her family yet. Caduceus is hanging out with random people at the bar so I thought I might join him. Make sure there’s no trouble.”

Fjord peeks back at the ladies who seem to be calming a bit before turning back and nodding. “Buddy system, always good. You said Caleb was in a bad way?”

She nods. “The last few days have been a lot. I didn’t think I’d miss the north but I can’t wait to go back.”

He huffs out a small laugh, “Right? I’ll feel a lot better facing certain death if we can ensure that these families will be safe.”

Yasha nods and hands him a package through the slit in the door. “One of The Gentleman’s people brought this to us. For Jester.”

Fjord can smell the cinnamon wafting from the package. “I’ll pass it along.”

Yasha smiles a little and waves. “I’m going to go watch Caduceus. I’ll send a message if anything turns weird.”

Fjord nods. “Good call.”

He turns back to the bed where the two Lavorre women are still sniffling a little but talking quietly to each other with small giggles sprinkled in. They’ve moved to the head of the bed and Jester is helping her mom out of her boots. He closes the door fully and dismissing the sword, he grabs one of the chairs and wedges it under the doorknob. When he turns back around, Jester is watching him fondly from where she sits with her mom. He gives an awkward grin and holds the box aloft.

“I think your dad sent pastries. Of a cinnamon sort.”

Jester pats the bed in front of her for him to join and moves to take her own boots off, groaning at how sore she is. Fjord hastens over and puts the package on the bed and kneels in front of her.

“Hey, you alright?” He grabs her hands and holds them for a moment, waiting for her to look at him.

Her voice is wobbly when she responds, “That is a dangerous question to be asking me right now, Fjord.”

He tilts her chin to look at him. “Why? Cause you can’t hide the sad right now?”

She looks at him and nods with a watery smile. “Yeah. And everything hurts.”

Fjord straightens, “Why didn’t you say something? I can actually help with that!” He closes his eyes to concentrate on the small pool of healing he can access when he feels one of his eyelids being tugged up. Wrinkling his face at her, hoping she’ll laugh, he growls playfully, “What!” His heart soars when she giggles at him and slides her hand to cup his cheek when he opens his eyes. 

“I’m okay, Fjord. I’m just sore from yesterday. It was a little more action than I was expecting and the lava was just a lot on top of that. Save your healing, who knows if we’ll need it later or not.”

He nods and bats her hands away when she goes back to unlace her boots and starts loosening the ties himself. He’s silent for a moment, struggling a bit with the laces before he says quietly, “It may take me saying a few more times, but you don’t have to hide the sad from me, you know that right?”

He looks up to see her nodding. “I know. I’m just more used to hiding it than showing it, you know?”

He smiles, nods and returns to the boots. What she says takes a minute to register before his head shoots back up, hands gripping her calf. “Wait, did you say lava?”

She winces at the tight grip and he loosens it with an apology, running a gentle hand where he’d squeezed. 

“I may have fallen into the lava?” she mumbles, not looking at him. 

“You what?!” Fjord sits back in shock. “And you’re walking around?”

“Don’t worry! Caduceus healed me up really good and I only half fell in.”

He looks at her incredulously, “Only half in? Oh sure, that makes it all fine then.”

He goes back to tugging her boots off, infinitely more gentle this time. “Well at least you had the fire ring with you.”

He hears a vague agreement above him and leans his forehead on her knee. “You weren’t attuned to it, were you?”

She starts shaking above him and he looks up to see her desperately trying to hold back her laughter and he bursts into laughter too, collapsing against her and the bed. 

Struggling to get the words out past his giggles, “The thing is...I really...could have used it...in the Tapestry Room...when the door exploded!”

“Oh no!” She flops backwards on the bed laughing even harder. 

Fjord gets himself back under control and his mirth is quickly sobered when he gets one of her boots off and sees the damage the lava left.

“Oh Jester…”

He runs a finger down her scarred leg and sighs moving to the other boot. When he gets it off and carefully sets them nearby, he scoops up her legs and supports her back as she scoots up against the headboard next to Marion who had already snuggled under the covers and is watching them with a small smile. He pulls the covers down so Jester can slip under them whenever and as Jester heaves a tired sigh, he leans down and presses a small kiss to her forehead before retreating to the chair at the door. Jester looks at him confused and points at the bed. 

“You can sit with us Fjord, we don’t bite!”

“Unless you want us too...”

“Mama!”

“I joke, Sapphire, I joke.”

Fjord stands and awkwardly shuffles over to the bed, tentatively perches on the edge and opens the box of pastries for Jester. Her eyes light up in delight and she grabs one, tears it in half and offers one half to Marion.

Marion takes it and holds it in her hands. She turns to Jester. “Since we’re having hard conversations today,” she pauses. “Jester. Something has changed about you. You look different.”

Jester tears up again, “Oh mama please don’t ask that.”

Marion swipes a tear from her cheek and looks away. “So something did happen.” 

She looks down at the pastry in her hand. “I-”

“I lost five years Mama,” Jester blurts out and covers her mouth. Fjord feels his heart wrench at the reminder and moves farther onto the bed, sitting cross-legged at the foot and reaches out putting a hand on her quilt covered leg, offering support and comfort.

The look of utter dismay on Marion’s face matches the horror he’d had watching it happen first hand.

“They took it from me, and I didn’t even know,” Jester moves her hand long enough to say as more tears come.

“Oh my Sapphire, come here.” Marion pulls her into a long hug that leaves them both wiping away more tears. Fjord drops his head in his hands wishing he could undo that day, but choices made are choices made and they’d all had no clue how dangerous those statues were. He scrubs at his face with both hands and drops them in his lap studying them. They should have known. After that stupid necromancy crystal.

Vandren had always said ‘You travel the path you choose.’ Fjord grits his teeth and metally tacks on the lesson he’d learned in the last year, ‘But you don’t have to travel that path alone.’ He looks up and sees Marion watching him over Jester’s shoulder. She extends a hand to him and he takes it, confused. She squeezes it tightly and mouths, “Thank you.” 

He nods in return. They’ll all get through this. They’ll help each other through this. As a family. He tucks that sentiment deep down in his heart where hopefully no one can see it and only he feels its warmth. For now at least.


End file.
